Third Grade Girlfriend Routine

Third Grade Girlfriend Routine (Arcane)
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Meta-Topics to transition from
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Childhood
Getting in trouble
Early relationships


PUA: You know how kids go through this phase where they think the opposite sex is gross?
HB: Yeah
PUA: Well, I never went through that. Ever since I was born I've loved girls. When I popped out of my mom I probably hit on the nurse.
(Pause slightly to see her response)
PUA: So in elementary school when all my friends thought that girls had cooties I was secretly making out with them during playtime. Sometimes, I'd even do cutesy stuff like pretend we were getting married or whatnot.
(Pause slightly to see her response)
PUA: I remember this one in third grade, I had this girlfriend. But now I was with this other girl under the building block table. Yeah, third grade and I was already cheating on my girlfriends.
(This almost ALWAYS gets a laugh)
PUA: So I'm kissing this girl and my girlfriend finds me and freaks out. I get up and try to explain that we were just playing doctor or some shit. Now as kids we never wore bluejeans or belts or anything, I wore these sweat pants things with the elastic waistband, and right there she pulls my pants AND my underwear down. (You'll get a good reaction right here as she should totally be into the story by now)
PUA: I didn't know what to do. I'm standing there with my weenie hanging out. So for some reason, I figured the best thing to do, would just be to pull her pants down too. I grab them but she jumps back a step and sticks her tongue out at me. Now I wasn't about to let her get away with all this so I jump forward. But I forget that I've got my undies around my ankles so I trip and fall on top of her.
And JUST at that moment the teacher turns around from the blackboard and just freezes with the most horrified look on her face. I remember the chalk falling from her hand, her screaming, and then the entire class turns and sees me half naked on top of my girlfriend.
(ROFL)
PUA: I was sent to the principal, but I never really got in trouble. The principle actually laughed about it once I told him what happened. He let me go saying, "Remember Arcane, in the classroom, we keep our hands off and our pants on".

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